"Mitchell, how do you deal with stress"? You might ask me. You might not ask, but for the sake of this blog...you did. But before I answer that question, I'd like to take a moment and talk about stress. More about what I do when stress inevitably weasels its way into my life, threatening to disrupt the serenity I value and have worked so hard to achieve.
Something that confused me about stress after getting some sobriety under my belt was that it still popped up. Somehow, I thought that removing alcohol from my life was this magic switch that just made everything better. And in a few ways, it was. But it wasn't the only component causing my suffering. If only removing the substance was the route I was going to take again, I was running the risk of being a "dry drunk". Which has never actually worked in the past. Queue the next step after removing the substance. Therapy.
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Somewhere during the therapy I was getting in the recovery program I got sober in my therapist was talking to me about stress, coping mechanisms to battle it, and the dangers of relapse stress leads us to. My therapist told me "Life doesn't actually get easier. We get stronger and smarter.". With that, we dug into ways I can self-care and discipline myself to keep myself from getting so debilitatingly stressed out, learning to help myself stay balanced and away from that dreaded "R-word"(relapse).
"If you think adventure is dangerous, try routine; it is lethal." —Paulo Coelho
It took time to have the self-awareness to actually identify when the self-care and coping mechanisms needed to be implemented. There's a level of grace you should give yourself while learning to live a balanced life. You, like the rest of us, are not going to get it right the first time. And that's okay. Many people changing their ways to live a life in recovery from substance use disorder or other addictions have never lived like this before. Be nice to yourself.
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So, to answer your question from the beginning, to eliminate stress from my life, I do something that adds to my serenity. Finding things like this you can do, with or without other people is going to be crucial to your well-being moving forward. Forever.
This week I was getting stressed. So, I found someone that makes the sun shine a little brighter when they're around, went on an adventure, tried a new (new to me) Mexican restaurant, walked a few beaches, found some treasures (first pudding stone ever), and took some pictures along the way. That building stress never stood a chance. What works for you may look different than this, and that's okay. But I highly recommend you find something that creates this stress-melting effect in your life and don't stop trying new things until you do. It could save you from that possible relapse, or even your life.
Until next time.
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